Day 143

Having to post a picture every day, and just using the day number because I’m too bad at titles and at least won’t miscount this way, you really notice how time goes by. I have been here for ninety days, one-hundred, one-hundred twenty. Will I reach 200?

Because decisions have to be made, mostly because per August first I won’t have a place to live and speaking from recent experience, that’s not a stress situation I want to return to again.

But that means that I have to discover if Ottawa is worth staying for, if Canada is worth staying. And that will largely depend on a job, a job that is satisfying and enriching. Because right now I could work to find such a thing in the Netherlands, and have friends and family nearby. Those are on the other side of the scale, the worry that if I am gone too long, I won’t fit into their lives any more (especially the friends’ ones).

So I’m looking for jobs again, casting the net wide, down into the States. Maybe I’m worth a work permit, even when I’m not good enough for any other one.

Until then? I enjoy the weather, I enjoy making money I can spend, there are moments of ‘That’s my city’. I try to not to think too long about it, it’s just confusing.


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